Monday, May 21, 2007

I can't believe Rock Hudson was gay, I mean, women loved him...

Despite this very telling film title, no one saw it coming.
Also, Gina Lollobrigida has been declared the Italian National Mountain Range. Thank you, Gina. 'Look out. Look, I don't see the sun anymore!' - Good Morning, Vietnam

The above picture is from Eastwood Mall in 1965. The Eastwood Theatre was originally a one-screen house with original Cinerama capabilities. The original Cinerama technology was an anamorphic 70mm (shooting movies with 3 cameras), and consequently, presented by 3 projectors. "How the West Was Won" is probably the most famous of the ten films shot on the original 3-camera format.

Eastwood in '65 and '04.
There were 2 Cinerama theatres in B'ham, the other was at The Ritz. Well, it was HUGE curved screen, but eventually the auditorium was converted into two, and it became the Eastwood Twin. I remember seeing movies like Song of the South and E.T. here. *tear* Joined later by the Village East Twin across the street, both theatres would be closed with the opening of the Festival up the street in 1989 (for more dead movie houses, check out B'ham Wiki). Village East became [a now defunct] OfficeMax and Eastwood became office space, but was recently torn down with the rest of the mall, to help further the GNP of the People's Republic of China (by building a Wal-Mart).

Learn more about cinerama at

Learn more about Eastwood Mall at

Monday, May 14, 2007

Rickwood Field featured on

America's oldest ballpark was built in 1910, 2 years older than Fenway and 4 years older than's Jim Caple did a piece on Rickwood. Props to Jim for stopping by America's Ballbark. Read the story here. I was ten years old when the Barons moved to the Met - ahem, excuse me, I meant to say Regions Park. Whatever.

Even though my memory doesn't serve as well as it used to, I do remember riding in my dad's '65 Nova SS to games. I remember my great grandfather coming along on occasion. Unfortunately, I was too young to appreciate the gravity of the experience of watching baseball with Granddaddy Bryant (a former ballplayer himself who loved the game). However, I was not too young to appreciate the humor at one game when he pointed out to me that a pigeon had dropped an extra topping on the slice of pizza in the hand of the lady sitting in front of us. I can't remember if we stopped her, or if someone else told her, or if she ate it. Good times.

Even though she is still undergoing some renovations, the Met is just, blechhh. HOK Sport built her in the middle of the 80's, the pre-Camden Yards era when high-capacity, sterile facilities were all the rave, kinda like a mini-New Comiskey (pre-U.S. Cellular renovations). The Met has average sightlines, crappy seating, and a concourse that seems to have narrowed over the years (although that aspect may just be a result of me getting fatter). I know they've redone (or redoing) seats and altered the concourse, but she consistently receives disappointing marks by those die-hard baseball traveling bloggers. Here's a blog that kind of sums it up and another webpage that echoes similar sentiment. Just visit Riverwalk Stadium in Montgomery or Trustmark Park in Jackson, and you'll understand where they're coming from. Rickwood was a neat old place. (And apparently Jim Caple isn't the only one who appreciates it.) I've driven over there occasionally just to look around (in broad daylight, mind you), she looks pretty good.

Which brings me to my point, we're coming up on the 12th Annual Rickwood Classic, and for the 12th straight year I will probably miss it. I've always been away at college or law school or something. It's always during the day in the middle of the week, it seems like they'd make more money if they had it on a Saturday or something. But anywho, this year I figured I'd make it. No job, nothing to do, perfect. Wrong. I got a mandatory CLE on ethics or something. Well if you want to catch a ballgame, complete with throwback jerseys and old-school ambiance, check out the Rickwood Classic on May 30 at 12:35 p.m. I'll be at the bar center downtown if you want to join me for some ethics & professionalism.

Saturday, May 12, 2007

RocketWoman, burnin' out her fuse up here alone...

What about this one: Lisa Nowak, former astronaut,
Navy test pilot, engineer, and diaper enthusiast -
possible relation to SNL player Seth Meyers? Oops I Crapped My Pants can hold a lot of dung!For more thoughts on Lisa, click here...
(Google/Gmail/Blogger login required, sorry.)

*Addendum: Welp, the article to which that link referred to is no longer available. Lucky for you I saved the article and my comment to it:

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

women are crazy

Houston, We Have a Problem
Cops say Lisa Nowak drove 900 miles in diapers so she wouldn't have to stop on trip to confront romantic rival

can i take an example of one absolutely crazy woman who performed an unprecedented act and then use this as a blanket example to prove that all women are crazy? despite all of the logic and science in the world, the answer is YES!

it is rather humorous though . . . i mean seriously, diapers? she probably spent as much time going to buy the diapers as it would have taken her to stop along the way to pee.

my comment:
sagefats said...
she has been in outer space for crying out loud! she has a masters in aerospace engineering or something. but deep down under a facade of intelligence and rational thought, she's just a crazy whorin' homewrecker.

i mean, come on! you can't take 5 minutes to stop at a stuckey's and go pee? what if she had to crap? i guess that makes her a nasty crazy whorin' homewrecker.

and she's a freakin' astronaut. she can't spring for the $114 southwest airfare from houston to orlando? and they even have a toilet on the plane, she wouldn't have to wear her "oops i crapped my pants." i guess that makes her a cheap, nasty, and crazy whorin' homewrecker.

something must've happed up there, like a solar flare or event horizon or something. i smell a "chewbacca defense" coming on...

Friday, May 11, 2007

Oh - oh, telephone line, give me some time, I'm livin' in twilight...

Oh, telephone line, give me some time, I'm living in twilightAmerican Telephone & Telegraph began in 1880 as a project by the American Bell Company to create a viable and cost-effective telephone network for America. Nineteen years later the AT&T project company was so successful that it bought her parent, American Bell. The AT&T company built our country's communication infrastructure. The natural result, well she was a monopoly. But it's not like some evil barons in top hats just started buying up all the pig bellies or sugar or gold one day to corner the market - no, this company invented and created an entire technology. (All Bell-Meucci debates aside...)

Well this monopoly (for the most part) provided affordable, quality service for nearly a century, until the government decided that "Ma Bell" was getting too big for her britches. After WWII, the country experienced an enormous surge in technological development by numerous companies (i.e. would-be phone company competitors), but because of the natural monopoly, many new technologies would stagger in dormancy (fiber-optics, microwave communications equipment, etc.). In 1974, in a move that I'm sure was in no way encouraged by money from Microwave Communications, Inc., the Justice Department brought an anti-trust suit against AT&T.

A sign that hung in many Bell facilities in 1983 read:

"There are two giant entities at work in our country, and they both have an amazing influence on our daily lives. . . one has given us radar, sonar, stereo, teletype, the transistor, hearing aids, artificial larynxes, talking movies, and the telephone. The other has given us the Civil War, the Spanish-American War, the First World War, the Second World War, the Korean War, the Vietnam War, double-digit inflation, double-digit unemployment, the Great Depression, the gasoline crisis, and the Watergate fiasco. Guess which one is now trying to tell the other one how to run its business?"
(*Actually, to be fair, I should point out that the Krauts and the Commies did play a part in some of those items.)

I'm melting! I'm melting! What a world...I really hate to defend the phone company, but I think the sign had a point. Well, some judges and executives got paid off, and as a result of the suit, in 1984, AT&T agreed to divest many of her subsidiaries (the "Baby Bells"), in return for being allowed to venture in to the computer business (which was a HUGE flop, by the way). So now customers had to go to different companies for long distance and local service, and there was a whole host of corporate break-ups, spin-offs, and restructurings. Bell Labs/Lucent, Oracle, Western Electric - not to mention all the regional local companies (there were many which later consolidated on there own - for instance, BellSouth used to be at least 3 different companies).

The idea was to give folks a choice. Sounds good, right? New companies like MCI & Sprint could now operate (thanks to a court order) on the physical infrastructure that another company built. Sounds fair to me. Well if it'll bring LD prices down, I guess it's ok (I didn't pay a phone bill back then, but folks say prices didn't go down like we were promised. LD sort of went down, but local went up, up and up some more. Mmm...)

However, another result of the suit allowed the subsidiary companies to remain as monopolies of local service! What a crock. So all the many "Regional Bell Operating Companies," South Central Bell (later BellSouth), Southwestern Bell (SBC), Bell Atlantic (GTE, later Verizon) - they still had customers by the, um, well, by the bills.

Then cellular service came along, and BellSouth offered BellSouth Mobility (later Cingular), as I'm sure all the other Baby Bells offered their own versions. AT&T also had AT&T Wireless.

I'm getting to my point - and kudos if you can keep all this straight - AT&T begats Baby Bells, like BellSouth and Southwestern (SBC). Baby Bells begat cell companies, like Cingular. What happens 20 years later, the Baby Bells come back. AT&T starts buying up Lucent, Oracle, Western Electric, Cingular buys AT&T Wireless, SBC buys AT&T (keeping the AT&T name), AT&T buys Cingular, and now AT&T buys BellSouth.

Ma Bell: back together again
God creates dinosaurs. God destroys dinosaurs.
God creates man, man destroys God, man creates dinosaurs.
Dinosaurs eat man, woman inherits the earth.
Doesn't that seem crooked? Rich people got richer by breaking up the phone company. The phone companies made money off of being broken up. And now they're going to make more money by getting back together. Just two more companies to go and we're back to a full-blown monopoly again! So the government that once said such a monopoly was bad, is now permitting these huge-ace mergers? I guess the joke's on us.

Monday, May 07, 2007

"I done stoled from the Wal-Mart..."

5/6/2007, 4:54 p.m. CDT
The Associated Press

ATTALLA, Ala. (AP) — Two convicted shoplifters were sentenced to wear a sign saying, "I am a thief, I stole from Wal-Mart," and stand for four hours in front of the Attalla store.

A shoplifter usually is banned from a store, fined, ordered to pay restitution and given probation. But Attalla City Judge Kenneth Robertson Jr. required the "I am a thief" sign for the misdemeanor offense.

Cletus never did no stealin' from the Sprangfield Wal-Mart
I bet that ol'
Cletus Spuckler

wouldn't try to
steal from
the Springfield
Lisa King Fithian, 46, of Attalla, stood in front of the Wal-Mart Supercenter on Saturday from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. wearing the sign on her front and back to avoid a 60-day jail sentence. Another convicted shoplifter was at the store from 3 p.m. to 7 p.m.

Fithian maintained her innocence. She told The Gadsden Times for a story Sunday that she was taking a $7 item to the service desk in a shopping cart because it would not scan.

Wal-Mart manager Neil Hawkins said the store would not have prosecuted if they had not been sure she was shoplifting and the judge convicted her.

Hawkins said the store did not ask the judge to sentence shoplifters to wear the sign.

However, he said he supports the public display if it's a deterrent to shoplifting.

Information from: The Gadsden Times,